No Milk Today…

I never imagined I’d see the day when supermarket shelves were bare. To be honest I thought friends were exaggerating, but no! The world’s gone raving mad!

A flu virus (labelled Covid-19), like no other virus (apparently), which began in China (allegedly), has now stopped the world and its economies from functioning, and in the process sent folks insane. Our government has pleaded with the population not to bulk buy — to no avail. It’s every person for themselves. There is a massive shortage of food in the supermarkets and it’s caused by shoppers queing to get through the doors at 6am. By 7:30am there is not a crumb of bread in sight or a droplet of milk left. Not a grain of rice, nor a dusting of flour to grace the shelves. Neither a jar of coffee nor a packet of tea is safe from the marching marauders. Trolleys are piled high before the sun rises, and if you can find a toilet roll (yes, I kid you not!) or even kitchen wipes, well you just won’t!

But the worst of all by far is the absence of medicine. Got a headache? Tough! There are no pain killers to be had. Cold and flu remedies? No, nothing. And if you ask for any at the pharmacy you’ll be treated as if you’re an undesirable and you’ve just asked for heroin. How females go on with their personal requirements, I’ve no idea. There are people I know who have been on the receiving end of both physical and verbal assault. “Please don’t panic buy!” is the order of every day. “There’s enough to go round”, falls on deaf ears. For this is war. It’s the end of the world. We’re all going to hell in a handcart. Fight for survival and may the fittest win, and the loser will die.

I detest and deplore these survivalist cretins for all the damage they are doing, both to other desperate shoppers and, of course, to the suffering ill and infirm. These barking mad nutcases sprint around the aisles raiding everything of any use, take it home and stack it high in garages and living rooms. And the fresh food that goes off is presumably dumped.

What toilet rolls?

The humble cold and flu treatments, including paracetamol, are now appearing on ebay at 3+ times their original value. I have witnessed one pack of well-known branded cold and flu treatment, that cost £3.99 3 weeks ago, is now on ebay for £170.00. I’m not joking! Check it out yourself, unless it has already been sold. But even the supermarkets and High Street drug chains seem to be getting in on the act. The price hike on some products has become obscene. Bet you those prices won’t go down after Coronavirus is but a distant nightmare. Like any past wars and famines, there are always those who are raking it in. You can bet your bottom dollar that record profits will be recorded to history by the food chains and wholesale suppliers soon. Make mine a double.


And the biggest mystery of all is why, oh, why have fuel prices risen? Does anyone know? There is a massive glut of oil on the world market that has recently driven the price down. Covid-19 comes along, and 3 week’s later fuel is hiked up by 10 per cent. Will that ever come down again? Flying pigs and all that.

So, buy and supply food for those elderly and infirm (there isn’t any, probably of either as things are going!), use sanitiser on your hands (there isn’t any), wash your hands with soap (there isn’t any), and keep away from others who might have the virus (so don’t leave your house). If you’re over 70, well, according to the government, you’ve had it anyway so what’s the point.

So what’s the answer to our present predicament? It’s what we have to do. See you at 4am in the morning outside Wallmart or Tesco’s armed with baseball bats and anger issues. I’m going for 2 trolley loads of toilet rolls myself. It’s going to be a fight to the finish, and may the best man win. Good luck, everybody.

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